Family matters and I am not talking about the show.  We all know that with a family comes drama, fights, disagreements and conflict, but in the end most of us know that no matter what, family comes first.  When you think of family, they are the individuals that hold us together.  They are the glue to our very existence.  When we need them they are the first ones there by our side, through the good, bad and ugly.

I can’t even envision what I would be, without the values that make me through my parents.  Of course we are all different, but with diversity comes culture, comes variety.  We all can gain positive reinforcement and are provided with structure and guidance through our family.

What would we ever do without family?  I personally know that through thick and thin, whether being miles apart I would always have my family by my side. 

What is the definition of family; –noun 1. parents and their children, considered as a group, whether dwelling together or not.  2.  the children of one person or one couple collectively: We want a large family.  3.  the spouse and children of one person: We’re taking the family on vacation next week.  4.  any group of persons closely related by blood, as parents, children, uncles, aunts, and cousins: to marry into a socially prominent family.  5.  all those persons considered as descendants of a common progenitor.  6.   Chiefly British. approved lineage, esp. noble, titled, famous, or wealthy ancestry: young men of family.    7.   a group of persons who form a household under one head, including parents, children, and servants.    

When reading that it sees pretty black and white, cold almost, but with family comes love. And that is the basis, in which we see family.  We don’t look at the word family and think black and white, we see the bigger picture. The categories that make us what we are. The nurturing, the compassion, the love, the respect.  With those, the making of a family is easy.

I come from a different breed than my husband.  He indeed is a wonderful father, but I definitely believe that he learned what love was through his path of life.  Through the women that he has been in relationships with, through his children.  I do not believe that he learned love through his family.  He may disagree with me on this issue, but from what I see he and I were raised with different principles.

Family for me represents our strengths, they teach us wisdom, they give us values, family as a whole are seen as love. 

What is the definition of love then;  –noun 1.   a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.   2.  a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.   3.  sexual passion or desire.  4.   a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person;   5.   (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.  6.   affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one’s neighbor.  7.  strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.  8.   the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.   9.   the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.

When reading that I see my family, but I absolutely do not see my husband’s family.  It is really sad, that my husband hasn’t had the same kind of up-bringing as me.  I have had the fortune of having a wonderful set of parents, and through all of life’s rides, great siblings. 

My in-laws have somewhere down their path of life, miscommunicated love.  They have forgotten that family comes first. They have forgotten that their children and grandchildren are people.  Human beings.  They have forgotten that people have feeling; they have forgotten that their children, that they have brought into the world, are still and always will be their children.  Young or old, their children need love, affection and encouragement.  My husband definitely didn’t receive any positive re-enforcement from his family.  I find that this is so sad.

We all need to be loved, we all need to be respected.  So next time you think that you don’t have time, and things are an inconvienence, remember you to may need something in return.  Help is a two way street, and family should always be there!!  No matter what!

I am writing this post because I want to share how to treat a high fever for a child that is sick or has H1N1 and yet so unmotivated to write anything right now. 

Recently our laptop crashed and I have been waiting for that to get fixed, as the weeks go by, so does my enthusiasm.  I really enjoy just laying on the couch, with my feet up, Pepsi in hand, ready to write.  It seems to me that at the time I have lots to say, but not so much when I have to sit at the computer desk and focus!!  That is my daughters favorite thing to say, “focus daddy, I need you to listen to me.”  “What you’re doing isn’t as important as what I have to say to you.”  Father, “what do you need to say to me?”  Daughter, “well nothing really, I just want you to listen to me.”  Cracks me up every time.  A little woman in the making.

So the biggest thing in our house is my husbands fear that we will get the H1N1 virus.  That is all and well, but it has gotten a little over board.  We aren’t around anyone and yet, sterilize your hands, sterilize your hands. 

Purell and I have become secret lovers!!  I’m pretty sure that people wonder if I have become a secret alcoholic…..with hand sanitizer!!  What’s that smell on you Lynn, let me smell your breath.   No joke, it’s really bad!  He has become OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder), I wish he felt this passionate about cleaning.  Mess is bad, mess is bad.  Would that make me wake up with a smile everyday!  And if it was his new found passion then I would sanitize as much as he wanted!!

So in our province the swine flu also know as H1N1 has been a prevalent virus in and around our community.  I am so happy that my daughter is not in school yet.  We all know that children are a factor in the spread of germs, and for the most part, the number one carrier in the spread of sickness. You can’t help but want to give your child extra love and affection when they are sick.  But children can be dirty little critters.  They put everything in their mouth, and touch everything!!  It’s not their fault though, they are just curious.  So when this outbreak began, we were even more aware of what our daughter was doing with her hands and where they were going.

When people speak of the H1N1 they talk about how intense the fever is.  I have been told that it is very hard to control and/or break.  So I asked my doctor and I thought that I would post what she said and if you are having a hard time with your method maybe you can take a couple of pointers from here.

1) Remove any excess clothing or blankets from the child.   They should wear one layer of thin clothing, and use a single blanket for sleeping.

2) Place the child in a cool room.  Turn up the air conditioning if possible or turn a fan on the child.

3) Administer either acetaminophen (Tylenol) or ibuprofen (Children’s Advil), for fever in children old enough to take this medication.  Acetaminophen is not recommended for children under three months, and ibuprofen is not recommended for children under six months.

4) Bath the child in a lukewarm bath.  Avoid bath water that is too cold, or alcohol rubs, as they will cause the child to shiver.  This will raise the child’s core body temperature, adding to the problem. 

5) Be aware that fevers are the result of both minor illnesses and serious infections.  Because it can often be hard to distinguish between the two, children with fevers should be brought to their pediatrician/doctor to be examined in many cases. Children less than three months old with a fever greater than 100.4 degrees, and children of any age with a fever greater than 105 degrees, should be seen by a doctor.

6 ) You also need  to keep your child from becoming dehydrated.  We lose extra water from the skin and lungs during a fever.

7) Encourage the child to drink clear fluids such as non-carbonated drinks without caffeine or juice (not water). Water does not contain the necessary electrolytes and glucose.  Other clear fluids are chicken soup, Pedialyte, and other rehydrating drinks available at your grocery or drug store.

Tea should not be given because it, like any caffeine-containing product, causes you to lose water through urination and may contribute to dehydration.

Your child should urinate light-colored urine at least every four hours if well hydrated.

Although this is a very stressful time for a lot of people I hope that this will help you and if you have any ideas please let me know also.  I know that my daughter had a virus two years ago, my husband I were so concerned about her, we went to the emergency room.  She was so sick, and her fever was so high.  Has your child ever had a fever so high that it scared you?  Share your story!!  Good luck!

I have a niece that on every special occasion she somehow or another always received a Bratz doll for a present from my in-laws.  I always said to my husband, if we have a daughter I really don’t want her to receive those kinds of dolls.

I absolutely don’t like what they represent.  I was brought up with Barbie’s.  Yes, they too are very physically endowed, but they are not as sexually appealing as a Bratz’s doll.

Now I know what you are thinking, well they are young and children don’t understand the perception of what they exemplify, but as parents, it is our responsibility to maintain guidance, and as far as I am concerned they suggest sexuality.  Why do we want to pre-condition our children, our young girls to be sexual beings.  We don’t allow our daughters to watch shows with prostitutes.  They don’t depict what we want for our children. Why do some parents not allow their young boys to play with toy guns?  Because they are impressionable.  And we don’t want them thinking that guns are toys.

Look how Bratz dolls are dressed, like bimbo’s, short skirts, halter tops, tall hooker boots, (not that tall boots represents hookers) and make-up that is sufficient for a doll army.

I know that when I was a young girl playing with my Barbie I would envision myself to be Barbie and dance with my Ken in the beautiful gowns that she had. 

Well how do we as parents not think that our young impressionable children aren’t thinking the same thing.  I know that my daughter said that she couldn’t wait to wear make-up like the Bratz doll.  That’s great, pre-conditioning.  It’s our responsibility to protect our children from the world.  They will be grown-ups in no time.  Why are we rushing this process, their minds are so susceptible.

So it came to that point that my daughter received a Bratz doll from the in-laws, two in fact.  They know that I don’t like what they represent and yet still with no respect got her the only thing that I don’t want my daughter to have.  So with that  I had to tell my daughter that the dolls were not dressed like ladies and that dolls are wonderful, but some dolls are for older girls.  At least that way they can understand right from wrong a bit more.

I know that some mothers out there are probably thinking that I have over analyzed this situation, but as my daughter’s mother I have to do what I think is the best for MY daughter.  And to me Bratz dolls are not positive stimulation.

Do you have a toy that you don’t like?  Or views on my feelings?