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Archive for the ‘My Husband’

Gifts From The One You Love

October 27, 2011 By: Lynn Category: My Husband, Simple Humour

Do you receive gifts from your significant other very often?  Well, I was just talking to my husband on the phone, who is at work.  As we were humming and hodding about how bored we both were, even though I have a 101 things to do, I mentioned to him that he had to stop and get bread for our daughter’s lunch tomorrow.

Me, “Hun, this is critical, you can’t forget, or she’s not eating tomorrow.”

Him, “I know, I know.”

Me, “While you are at it, you haven’t bought me flowers in years,   (that’s right, it’s not a typo, YEARS, how many you ask, thinking I might not know six years!!!!  Can you imagine!  Anyways, that’s something I let go of years ago.)   maybe you’d like to buy me some.  I did birth your two watermelon head children.”

Him, “You got flowers a couple of years ago from me.”

No word of lie, he was outside mowing the lawn and picked me a bouquet of weeds.  Not the weed you smoke, at least that may have been fun, but real long grass weeds, and they were stinky weeds.  Needless to say, I think that he owns me flowers!!

What’s your favorite kind of flower?  Do you get flowers often?  I may get jealous, but tell me the truth!!

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When Is A Good Time For Parents To Have Sex When You Have Children In The Next Room?

October 13, 2011 By: Lynn Category: Frustrated, My Daughter, My Husband, Our Children, Sex

If you have children then I am sure that you have probably experienced this situation at one time or another;  when is a good time for parents to have sex when you have children in the next room?

My husband and I have two small children, our daughter is six and our little fellow is 11 months.  My hubby works nights and for the most part sleeps all day, everyday.  Every now and then when he is awake in the daytime hours, we feel as though it would be nice to get it on have a quick love making session.  Now with two children, this has to be a thoughtout process and done absolutely quickly, before they fight, he starts crying, or before our daughter thinks that we’ve been, ”talking to long,” and opens the door to find out, what is none of her business.

So, on the odd occasion we will ask our daughter if she can be a big girl, and babysit her brother to give her daddy and I fifteen minutes to get it on talk privately, without any interruptions.  So, on that note we go in the bedroom, and do you think that I/we can concentrate?  OF COURSE NOT.  She is in the other room throwing a ball at his head playing catch, and not even five minutes in, our son is bored and gets up to play with the bedroom door handle and is banging on the door, screaming “momma”.  Grrr.

Let’s just say that on a number of occasions my husband is not very fulfilled by the end of our, “conversation.”  Does this ever happen to you?  Have you ever been in the middle of having sex with your significant other and have to stop because of the children?  When is a good time to have sex when you have children and both work opposite shifts?

 

 

“I Don’t Do That…”A Typical Quote That My Husband Says On A Regular Basis.

September 25, 2011 By: Lynn Category: My Daughter, My Husband, Pet Peeves, Simple Humour

If you are in a relationship or are married then you have probably heard that annoying phrase, “I don’t do that,” out of their mouth.  This is a quote that I hear on a regular basis.  There seems to be a lot of things that my significant other won’t can’t do.  Now you may be one of those extremely delusional  lucky women/men that think that you balance each other out and that they may not do something at the moment you ask them to, but they make up for in other ways.  Well, if that is you then I am happy *rolling my eyes* that you have that kind of support system, but for me in my house, that kind of support just doesn’t exist.

This morning I was getting my daughter ready for school, so feeling a little overwhelmed I was yelling asking my husband nicely to get back out of bed to change the baby’s diaper and get him dressed so that we could take our daughter to school.  So as a typical morning I am doing my daughter’s hair and asked my husband to put the baby’s shoes and socks on, well he pipes up,

 “I don’t do shoes.” 

Wwhhaatt!??  That make no sense to me!!@! 

Husband, do you wear shoes?” 

 ”Um, well, yay,” 

“well then you do shoes!!” 

Lord grant me the strength.  “I don’t do shoes,”  can you imagine, if I could get away with the phrase, “I don’t do that, “ then I am pretty sure that I would be on a permanent vacation on a tropical resort, being served by hot  half naked men.  These are some others that I hear quite often,  I don’t change diapers, I don’t do laundry, I don’t do silverware, I don’t cook like you and I don’t want to screw it up, that one is special.   All I know is that my son will NOT be following in his father’s footsteps.  ;)   Whomever gets my boy will be indebted to me forever!

Do you have any funny yet annoying phrase that your husband or significant other says to you?  Do you have a “I don’t do that,” example?

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